Update on Forgiveness 8

Lifes-Journey-Copy.jpg ©Delightfully Different LifeMy last post about forgiveness brought a wonderful blogging friend into my life, Lisa at Karma Per Diem, read it here.  I am doing an update because I still believe forgiveness is an important part of healing from bullying or any injury from others.  Today I found a wonderful detailed explanation of forgiveness from several religious views at New World Encyclopedia which you can click on below:

Forgiveness – New World Encyclopedia

I found a video about forgiveness too; however, I could not verify the copyright status.  Therefore you will need to click on the link below to view it:

YouTube – Forgiveness and the Freedom of Letting go.

I welcome your views on the topic.  Have you found healing through forgiving someone?

Eliminate the Word Tattling 4


Word Press had what is your favorite word as a prompt a few days ago.  I do not have a favorite word, but I do have a least favorite one.  Well technically I guess it is a more than one word although they are all related to the same root word and meaning.  The words are: tattling, tattle-tale, tattle.  I think we should ban them from schools after second grade and replace them with informing, telling or reporting.  The reason I say this is because bystanders are so important to the safety of victims of bullying, yet too many do not speak up for fear of being labeled a tattle-tale in addition to fearing the bully

I think these words and their connotations discourage our children from reporting bullying. Kids do not want to be labeled as a tattle-tale. I suggest instead of using the word tattling, we talk to children about when to tell and when not to tell. Reporting someone who is harming others is sometimes necessary.  For instance, if you see a child being beaten by others and no one is coming to the child’s rescue, you definitely need to find an adult to help. You also need to find a way to help when someone is repeatedly ganged up on by other children even if it is not physical.

This goes back to the post I wrote about bystanders which you can read if you missed it:

The Importance of Bystanders | dswalkerauthor.

Informing, telling, or reporting to protect someone has a better connotation than tattling. Although criminals might not like informers, most of the rest of us are grateful for them. This is especially true when they take murders and drug pushers off the street.  This is not to imply that bullies are murders or drug pushers, but honestly what they do to the most vulnerable children is almost as bad.

I also still think the schools need to reward the bystander who does speak up with a tangible reward. Let me know what you think. When you were younger would you have been more likely to report someone being mean to another child if you knew you would not be called a tattle-tale, and instead might be rewarded and maybe even be someone’s hero?

Addendum: The video originally included in this post is no longer available. Basically it was a short segment by a group teaching children about reporting versus tattling.

Kung Hey Fat Choy 2011 7

Welcome the Year of the Rabbit!

LionHawaii’s population is approximately one third Chinese according to one of the writers for Examiner.com although that number includes those who are of mixed race like my children.  Therefore, like many homes in the islands we celebrate Chinese New Year.  Three years ago I even learned to make gau, a sticky brown sugar sweet treat made with rice flour to bring sweetness to the new year and help the family to stick together.  My mother-in-law makes the jai, a Chinese vegetarian dish for celebration of  the new lunar year.

I am grateful for my multicultural family and that we live in Hawaii where children grow up respecting multiple cultures.  The Lion belongs to my son.  My children used to pretend to perform a lion dance and ask for money from us when they were younger.  Traditionally feeding the lion money is supposed to bring one luck and wealth.  Now our lion is mostly for decoration although my two still like getting money.  Lai see is the custom of giving lucky money in special red envelops to unwed children as a symbol of good luck and wealth.

May you and yours have a year of harmony, joy, health, and prosperity!