Tag Archives: Dalai Lama

Empathy Is Walking the Path of Another; Even Our Enemies 8

Empathy, Famous Quotes, Gratitude, Life Lessons • Tags: , , ,

Twists of the Heart

At the point when anger and lust are generated, reality has become obscured; instead, we see extreme badness or extreme goodness, evoking twisted, unrealistic actions. — His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama

In Aspire: Discovering Your Purpose Through the Power of Words, Professor Arthur Watkins told author, Kevin Hall that the word empathy “springs from the soil.” He explained, “Pathy comes from path, and em is in. Empathy is walking the path of another.”

Professor Watkins went on to say that communication is a close cousin of empathy. “Communication comes from the Latin communicare, which means to share in common.”

Hearts filled with holes.

If you don’t get on another’s path, if you don’t go where he or she has gone, you can’t truly understand what that person is experiencing. — Kevin Hall

A year and a half ago, I completely changed my focus on this blog. I needed to focus on positives after a person who previously did a TED Talk on empathy became defensive and angry instead of showing empathy to my family. He did not walk our path so he did not see the holes in our hearts. Therefore, I totally understand the statement in Hall’s book:

It’s remarkable just how much can go wrong when the all-important ingredients of empathy and common ground aren’t firmly established.

I’m far from achieving the spiritual level of the Dalai Lama, but I did manage to stay calm during my conversation with the above mentioned individual. Still, I understand that it would be easy to let my response to the situation be anger too, and at times I have been angry. That is why I’ve focused on inner peace and supporting my loved ones privately instead.

I know that like the morning glories in my first picture, we are all connected, so I do talk about our experiences off-line when asked. Yet, I also respect the wishes of my loved one, and that is why I no longer blog about the details of our experiences. I know many of you are unable to walk our path and honestly, I hope you never have to do so.

Likewise, I have trouble walking the path of those who injured us, but I am trying to at least acknowledge that a failure to communicate contributed to the failures. And, part of the failures are mine.

I’ve been reading and studying, How to Be Compassionate: A Handbook for Creating Inner Peace and a Happier World by His Holiness the Dalai Lama.

Below are some of my favorite quotes from the book:

  • Just as smart public policy aims to educate people so that they can take care of their own lives, so it is with the practice of altruism: the most effective way to help others is by teaching them what to adopt in their future practice and what to discard from their current behavior.
  • With anger, all actions are swift. When we face problems with sincere concern for others, success may take longer, but it will be more durable. 
  • Whether we believe in God or karma (the power of actions and their effects), strong ethical values are the foundation of society, and must be the underpinning of our daily lives.
  • Another benefit of adversity is that hard times can build determination and inner strength. Through them we can also come to appreciate the uselessness of anger. We can even learn to nurture a deep caring and respect for troublemakers, because by creating trying circumstances, they provide us with invaluable opportunities to practice tolerance and patience.
  • Trying circumstances help you develop inner strength and the courage to face difficulty without emotional breakdown. Who teaches this? Not your friend, but your enemy.

This post was inspired by Kozo’s Bloggers for Peace Challenge.banner
Be sure to read other Bloggers for Peace Posts at:

B4Peace: A Tiger And His Boy Teach Empathy.

Empathy and Visiting Other Lands.

Life? Do We Learn From Our Past or Are We Condemned to Repeat It? 2

Bully Free, Differences, Education, Famous Quotes, Gratitude, Inspiring People, Life Lessons, Parenting, Setting Good Examples for Our Children • Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Quote

Most of us know some variation of the famous line by George Santayana, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” Yet, we keep repeating past mistakes again and again.

Those We Admire

Most of us admire people like His Holiness, the fourteen Dalai Lama, Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, Jr. and others who showed the world that there are gentler solutions to problems facing society. So, why do we continue to support meanness by failing to speak up when we see it and when we know it is wrong? How can we teach our children to learn from their mistakes if we fail as citizens of the world to learn from ours?

Mistakes

You may be asking yourself, “What mistakes?” Only you can answer for yourself. Let your heart be your guide.

I firmly believe mistakes are our best teachers. I hope so anyway since I have made more than I like. However, this post is about our future, our children.

The Way We Fail

We are failing the next generation when we say things like:

  • What’s the big deal?
  • Bullying has been around forever.
  • Kids will be kids.
  • That kid had it coming!
  • That kid is strange!
  • Don’t play with that kid!
  • I don’t like their parents.

or

When we say:

  • The school is responsible.
  • The parents are responsible.
  • I blame the Internet.
  • I blame social media.
  • That kid just needs a spanking!
  • That kid should be expelled!
  • Those parents should be sued!

or

When we are silent.

The Truth

The truth is everyone in society plays a part. Look around you! Work toward becoming a more compassionate person and setting a better example for our children by speaking up when your heart says:

  • This does not feel right!
  • Why would this be okay?
  • Should we really do that?
  • What happened to liberty and justice for all? That is what it says right? Not liberty for the majority, or just some, or just the ones who are like us?

Make a Difference

Refuse to believe those who say:

  • What can I do?
  • I’m just one person!
  • No one will listen to me!
  • What is the point?

Here’s what you can do if you do not trust your own voice:

  • Support those in your community who speak out if you are not comfortable speaking out yourself.
  • Contact someone you admire who is speaking out and let them know that you are grateful for their voice.
  • Tell your children why it is important to speak out and to back up other children who speak up if they do not feel they can do it themselves.

Inspiring Quotes From Those We Admire

Because we all share this planet earth, we have to learn to live in harmony and peace with each other and with nature. This is not just a dream, but a necessity.  ~ Dalai Lama XIV

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.  ~ Dalai Lama XIV

A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history.  ~ Mahatma Gandhi

The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would suffice to solve most of the world’s problems.  ~ Mahatma Gandhi

I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.  ~Nelson Mandela

There is no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children. ~Nelson Mandela

I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.  ~Mother Teresa

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.  ~Mother Teresa

Intelligence plus character—that is the goal of true education.  ~Martin Luther King, Jr., The Purpose of Education

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.’  ~Martin Luther King, Jr., I Have a Dream, 1963