I have to learn to expect less while still hoping for more. I have to try to be as good as my Golden Retriever thinks I am.
I have said it before and I am saying it again. Forgiveness is hard especially forgiving family members who seemingly fail to understand or even to try to understand. I had a small rant on Facebook yesterday related to this. I became the Grizzly Bear Mom again and charged ahead. The thing is I really think the people I get mad with are clueless. They do not see what I expect them to see.
Maybe they cannot see. Maybe they never will. Maybe I have to forgive them anyway and let it go. This is what my child is doing and now she has become the teacher. I have to go back to my previous posts and make more time to work on the steps Frederic Luskin outlines in his book, Forgive for Good. I hope to get back to posting about this next week.
Addendum to explain this post:
I asked all of our family to support my daughter and all of them are aware of how hard April and May of 2011 were for us. In July of 2011, I posted a comment to address my daughter’s You Tube video on my personal FB wall. I had posted her video on my wall the previous Thursday. She posted her video on her own FB wall the previous Wednesday, and she okayed my posting her video as long as I shared only with family. I hoped that my family would listen to her video. I believed that her voice and her words would touch their hearts since they have failed to comment on her blog posts.
I thought they were just not comfortable posting on her wall and they would comment on mine. Initially none of them responded, all of the families of my close first cousins responded either on my wall or hers except for one, who is rarely on FB and another, who is on vacation.
My brothers still have not been heard from although two of their wives did respond after my post. They are married to the two brothers who aren’t on FB. The third brother’s wife is never on FB, but he liked something she posted on his wall. I told him about the video when I talked to him Thursday, so I know he knew about it. Still he has not responded to her video. My brothers all married wonderful women, and as I mentioned in a previous post one of my brothers is battling cancer, so I can forgive him completely. Plus, he has always made an effort to stay in touch and to talk to my children.
I honestly believe all three of them love me, but it is very frustrating to realize they can watch my daughter’s video and still not call or at least e-mail. Their wives should not have to handle things for them. I have told them this previously and their wives have told them too. That is why I am so frustrated with them.
My daughter actually wanted to post the video on her blog, but I did not think that is a good idea since so many spammers and others sometimes try to make less than desirable comments on our blogs. That is also the reason I do not openly mention or link to her blog. Her blog has avoided conflict and spam while mine has not. She is growing up, but I am still protective.